Is an interesting word of many definitions. I often discussed my father as being one of the most disciplined people I know. He woke up everyday at the same time to get his children ready for school, always made sure we were fed, dressed, homework done. In the summers he would leave us multiplication work, bible verses to memorize and problem solving equations to keep our minds sharp before we were allowed outside to play. And on top of that, I was taking dance classes. Dance offers a certain discipline especially ballet, that requires the practice of repetition. Repetition, especially in ballet creates self control. Discipline can also mean a disciplinary action that invokes a penalty for undisciplined behavior. This is known as negative discipline. Positive discipline is a disciplinary action that provides a reward for disciplined behavior. The dynamics of the two are very interesting. In many ways, I understand the need of the balance for both negative and positive discipline but are we missing something when life is so black and white? The past few years my life has existed in organized chaos. I had the freedom to learn on a schedule I set for myself. It allowed me the mind that I always knew existed but never had the chance to explore. I was happy. Now, In order to make a substantial financial living I’m falling back into a system of another’s creation and it’s becoming harder for the little kid inside to come out. I’m in a theater production of peter and the star catcher, the story of peter pans journey to becoming Peter pan and how he is just a boy who never wants to grow up. The world, I always say has a way of making us grow up too fast. I spent my childhood being an adult and the last 10 years being in some ways a kid. It revived my creativity. I did background tv and in it, I got to play different roles everyday. I made real friends with people like me, who just wanted to “be a boy for a while.” Is repetition always the greatest teacher? I don’t know. I don’t think so. In theater, there’s always a time limit. The show has to end by a certain time to prepare for the next show or to avoid paying extra rent, or get out in time so the audience isn’t seated too long. It’s structure seems to cater to everyone more than the actors. We got down to our fastest run time that we’ve had in a while and what I noticed is a boost in energy, not necessarily positive. We quickened tempos for songs, jumped over each other’s lines and people were so excited, everything came out in high volume. Some say it was our best run yet. It felt like a loss of dynamics to me. I used to hail theater as the best way to learn acting but I honestly, find myself bored of the repetition. For some it is still exciting and I am happy for them. I yearn for the days to venture into the land of make believe again. My Neverland. Where creativity comes from within and around.